I Have Wood

What's up, my peeps?

I have to tell you this quick story. It has to be quick because the littlest monster is eating, and I know if I hang around under the table I'll be able to get me some chow.

Remember in one of my previous posts I was telling you I had to go so I could chew on some low branches of the trees in the yard? Well, today I had a bit of a mishap. I had just mauled one of the trees, and I was chewing away on this branch. This fu?king branch becomes lodged in the top of my mouth between my teeth. Yo mate, I couldn't get that sh?t out of there for the life of me. I had to walk around the house like a freaking dummy acting all weird and crap before the momma monster decided to check me out. We all know where this story is going, don't we. She's not the sharpest of claws, if you know what I mean, so she calls in the dad. At least now I know I'm going to get some relief. Only thing is he walks away!!! So I have the momma monster pinning me down, and this dude just walks away. He came back with a pair of freaking pliers!! I f?ck you not!! So he sticks those damn things into my gullet and pulls out this branch from inbetween my teeth. Man, I was glad to have it out of there.

Here's the pic as proof.

Talk to you all later. I have to go roll in the mud outside as payback for shoving pliers down my throat.

You are all my bitches!!!!

Sir Zipadelli